1st Lead U - Leadership Development
This podcast, now in Season 3, is dedicated to self-development, self-awareness, and learning to lead oneself so listeners can lead others well. If someone cannot lead themselves well, it will be difficult for them to be an effective leader of others. This podcast will help listeners understand what it means to 1st Lead U and build confidence in themselves and their leadership ability. Personal Growth Coach John Ballinger has spent 35 years developing the knowledge and material he shares with individuals, business owners, and leaders from a variety of areas.
1st Lead U - Leadership Development
We are Human - CHART - Ep 312
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Leadership starts with acknowledging the humanity in ourselves and others. True leaders understand that respecting people as individuals with unique needs, challenges, and strengths creates stronger organizations.
• The four H's of leadership: human, human nature, human resources, and human capital
• One in four people have already left their positions, with another 50% projected to leave due to lack of development
• People don't leave bad jobs, they leave bad managers who don't see them as individuals
• Leaders must understand five key social interactions: exchange, competition, conflict, cooperation, and accommodation
• Multiple generations in the workplace hear, react, and think differently
• Understanding personality differences helps diffuse conflicts before they escalate
• Self-awareness is critical – your team knows your triggers better than you do
• Companies harm productivity by hiring without proper training and onboarding
• The building blocks of successful relationships start with understanding human aspects
Visit firstleadu.com to download the Chart Acrostic detailing the C's (coach, commander, cop, counselor) and H's (human, human nature, human resources, human capital) of leadership.
Do we, as leaders, understand how to be humans that declare humanity as an item we should all be keenly aware of?
Speaker 2:Welcome to First Lead you, a podcast dedicated to building leaders, expanding their capacity, improving their self-awareness through emotional intelligence and developing deeper understanding of selfless leadership intelligence and developing deeper understanding of selfless leadership.
Speaker 1:Hello America, and welcome to First Lead you where we believe selfless leadership is essential. America is suffering a leadership crisis. Self-awareness and emotional intelligence is the key to developing selfless leaders.
Speaker 2:Now here is personal growth coach John Ballinger.
Speaker 1:Hello leaders, I'm John Ballinger. With First Lead U. I'm here with my trusted co-host, Mr Douglas Ford.
Speaker 3:Good afternoon John. How are you today? I?
Speaker 1:am good. We've had a pretty insightful day, wouldn't you say?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think we have had a really good day today, talking with some people about some upcoming events and things that we need to be doing to prepare for those and, um, in anticipation of what's to come yeah, that's uh, it's uh, and I've uh, I've actually been humbled going through the process of of writing a book, that talking about all of this and having people comment about the impact that leadership has been in on their lives, um, and there's a lot going on in 25 and into 26 with, firstly, jew, which is a lot going on so, but it's, it's needed. I was telling somebody today to ask me going on so, but it's it's needed. I was telling somebody today to ask me so, like, how's it going with uh leadership? And they'd read an article. It's actually, as at the dry cleaners and the lady is giving it's like I saw you in the paper and I hope you sell millions of books, like I do too.
Speaker 1:But that would be good on multiple levels. Yeah, yes, it would be Uh. So today's podcast uh is the beginning of the letter H and our, our acrostic new word, uh. For me, when Douglas uh told me that's what that was. Um, we're starting with the H's and I'm going to go through those h's, mr ford, uh, because I think they're they're extremely important and they were the original letter.
Speaker 3:The h was the original letter that I started working on like years and years ago so this yeah, this is coming off of our chart acrostic that you can download from our website. And so, yeah, we've gone through the c's, which were the the four hats or lenses, however you want to look at that that you use in leadership, and so now you're going to go through the four h's, but we're going to focus on the first one after we uh, after we go through this initial introduction, yeah, so the four h's are human, human nature, human resources and human capital.
Speaker 1:And when you go to the website and download the chart, you're going to see that human leadership starts with valuing every person. Human nature understands behaviors to inspire and motivate. Nature understands behaviors to inspire and motivate. Human resources nurtures talent for long-term success. And human capital invest in people to build strength. There was an article that I forwarded to you I think it was this week from Forbes that said one in four people have already left their positions in the company that they were with and another 50% are projected to leave. And when I saw that human resources, which is nurture talent for long-term success, one of the reasons people were leaving was that they didn't feel like that the company really cared about their growth, um, that they developed them or anything like that.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I think that's a common theme that we hear for people leaving. Uh, you know, there's a couple of these sayings. You know, people don't leave bad jobs, they leave bad bad managers or bad leaders. Uh, I would say another reason that they leave, as indicated, indicated by that study is for lack of vision. They don't think they're going to be able to go anywhere. Most people want to grow professionally, want to expand their abilities and their skill sets, and so if they feel like they're kind of stuck in a position and there's nowhere from the go, they quickly become dissatisfied in where they are.
Speaker 1:The reason this first one is is difficult to human. So we're talking. Years ago, when I started looking at what's the problem going into companies that were under duress, I had this like well, first off, the leader has to understand that everybody, including themselves, are working with, are humans, because it seemed like that there was a great disconnect from the upper leadership in an organization down to the lower leadership, that these people just were people, you know, instead of. They weren't robots, they weren't widgets, they weren't. They were people with feelings, problems, you know, challenges that they're faced with, and it looked like the divide to the upper management and organizations down to the people. There was this, this giant void, where the leader didn't really understand that.
Speaker 3:I think there's a big gap there where people don't necessarily look at their team especially if it's a large team as individual people. They kind of look at it as a group. And once you kind of start looking at a team as a group, then you don't have to deal with them as individual people or individual humans. You can just kind of deal with them as a group. And so that starts to take a lot of the personal connection out of it. And that's really where you start stepping off track as a leader, because you're not focusing on the needs of the individual. You're just like well, if that group does this or that group does that, well that's not good for the company, or we need that group to be smaller, or we need that, you know. So it just kind of starts showing a bad path If you're not looking at your team as individuals.
Speaker 1:One of the things the article really pointed out was the that people were uncertain about their future or the company's future, because, being in the trenches every day, they saw the gap between the leadership, but they also the gap between the customer, customer service and fulfillment, and they saw that whole thing kind of falling apart in their life. Either this company is not going to be in business and I'm not going to have a job, or somebody is going to roll it up in a merger and I'm not going to have a job. Business and I'm not going to have a job, or somebody's going to roll it up in a merger and I'm not going to have a job. And that uneasiness at the level of the worker in the business was really one of the one of the things that made the people just say I just need to move on.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I think it goes back to one of your favorite quotes by Admiral Grace Hopper you manage things and you lead people right. So if, if first of all all, you see that the managers aren't managing the things and you know they're not leading the people, then that certainly creates a good bit of angst. And if you can see that in multiple departments and and or then you hear a rumor or something that you think could be true, whether it is or not, about a company potentially being bought or sold or however that might transpire, I mean it certainly does put you in a position of disease, if I could use that word, if that's the right word. And yeah, because you want certainty, I mean another quote we use quite often. You know people don't want to move into a fog, so if you feel uncertain about something, you start looking for some place you can find some clarity and, uh, stability.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know I'm, I'm always, I always love to uh, put definitions out. You know we've been, we from Webster's and Oxford, since the beginning of the podcast. This one's actually difficult to read. I've sat here and read this as we've been talking the definition of human.
Speaker 1:Well, this will be good, because we probably all think we know what it is but I'm sure we don't so determining the meaning of human of any act of Congress or of any ruling, regulation or interpretation of various administrative bureaus and agencies of the United States. So the word person, human being, child or individual shall be included with every infant member of the species of Homo sapiens who is born alive at any stage of development.
Speaker 3:That's the definition.
Speaker 1:That's what it says.
Speaker 3:That's insane Okay I'm like I was reading that, I was like I mean, when you said the word homo sapien, I was like okay, well, at least that it gets to like a solid definition of what's. You know who we are in terms of entity? Uh, individual entity. Like I couldn't make that up, douglas when I saw that's a crazy.
Speaker 1:That's crazy that that we have to have such a complicated definition that the government reaches in and says this is what classifies someone as human.
Speaker 3:Well, so the fact that they use the word Congress then only limits that definition of human to the United States? Yes, because Congress can't make this determination for other countries as to what the definition of human might be.
Speaker 1:So it's very interesting termination for other countries as to what the definition of human might be. So, yeah, the very interesting person, human being, child, individual who is born alive or at any stage of development. So I I took that. I was kind of a head scratcher for me because the reality is someone that's born and is walking around, that's in the job, baby, whatever. That's a human being. And so that led me because I'm like to humanity, so I put I-T-Y on the end of human and said, well, let me do some humanity research.
Speaker 1:Humanity comes up as the human race, which includes everyone on earth. It also is a word that qualifies to make us human, such as the ability to love, have compassion, be creative and not be a robot or alien. Now that got a little bit deeper with right, because of artificial intelligence and robots coming on and all this stuff. You know I'm like. So there's a humanity that we all should understand when it comes to dealing with people, because of the love, compassion and creativity of who each one of us are.
Speaker 1:I tell people all the time we all matter, period. And I was reading an article the other day by a young football player that was drafted by the Tennessee Titans cam ward and they said he came into training camp and started learning the names of the people that were the janitors and the people that cook this, the people in the trenches every day Does he get easily just walk past and not acknowledge a hundred percent right, but he's like I need to know those people and they need to know me, because without them I can't even do what I do.
Speaker 1:He didn't, he didn't go into the let's go talk to these and all that stuff, but he's made an impact because he's changing the lens with which somebody in his position looks at humanity and to me. Good on him.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I mean, yeah, I read that article too and he went on to talk about, like, how he's already starting to see not him, but the organization is already starting to see an impact because of him and because the attitude he's brought and really the leadership that he's brought to that team, which has kind of been leaderless for the last couple of seasons uh, in terms of their ability to pull together and work really effectively as a team. And you know, it's like he lobbied for other players to come along with him from his, from his college team, so that because he wanted to have people that he connected with and that he could trust. And you know, if you expect me to lead, I need these people on the team. And the couple of people he brought along, they weren't first round recruit, you know draft picks and they they may not have even been in the draft, they were probably free agent selections after the fact.
Speaker 3:But it's like I need these people to be on this team with me to help me navigate these new and different waters, and so I thought it was a very uh, it was a very good article and I thought it was very. In other words, we use a lot emotionally intelligent on his part to uh a start to make sure he acknowledged those other people, like I said, people who do the housekeeping, who uh are working in the you know food services for the team. These are people he could easily walk by, just politely acknowledge and move on, but he's taking the time to engage with them, get to know their name. Hey, I'm going to be here every day for a long time, he hopes, and so he wants to get to know them, and so I thought that was a great example of early leadership.
Speaker 1:How many professional athletes do you think walk past those people?
Speaker 3:Yeah, I'd say that's hard to tell, but I mean, there's certainly some that you would assume do walk past those people because of their public persona. I would say that's probably hard to tell, but they may not. It obviously is. What he's doing is different, or it wouldn't warrant them writing an article about it, right? So so he's definitely doing something that's above and beyond, even if other players are getting to know these people he's being super, super intentional about it Right.
Speaker 1:So I, after I read the human definition and then worked into humanity, I actually asked this question. This is the question I wrote Do we, as leaders, know how to be humans that declare to humanity an item we should all be kingly aware of?
Speaker 3:Yeah, and man, I'm telling you I'll get emotional thinking about that, because I wonder how many leaders understand the impact that they could have on humanity if they led well yeah, yeah, and we and we've talked about that recently I mean, uh, just uh, I mean one of the people that you've worked with that we'll be talking more about, probably in the very near future you had an impact on one person. The position that they're in gave them the ability to have impact on hundreds, if not thousands, of people, which then, as we do our multiplication, because we talk about, behind every person there's a family. Multiplication, because we talk about, behind every person there's a family. So now you're talking about multiple thousands. You know 50 to 60,000 people because you took the time and that person took the time to invest in them, you and him, and them and themselves, to complete that circle of of people. And you know.
Speaker 3:So, yeah, look how many lives have been changed for the positive just because you've invested in one person and that one and they invested in themselves. And it goes back to first lead you right, like they. He acknowledges like I needed help. I was looking for the right connection of someone who could help me get through this period of time and this struggle that he was having. You were able to be placed in his life at a time where you could be most impactful. He was open to hearing that, open to receiving that, and then it was allowed him to go out and do what he needed to do.
Speaker 1:He actually used the words. I was hungry for it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, which is a key difference, like I mean we talk about all the time leaders can try to lead, but you know, I mean people's, people have to follow, right, they have to be willing to to follow and you know, and you and I've talked about this before I actually said this to somebody in a meeting not too long ago and I've seen you work with a lot of people and, um, you know he was hungry for it. I came kicking and screaming right, mean, I was, I was resistant to a lot of the things, like every time we would talk about things I'd be. I don't believe that. I don't want to do that. I don't feel like I just should do that, even though I knew I needed to do it. Right and uh, but uh, yeah it.
Speaker 3:It does make a difference, and reason I was willing to open up and to go on the journey and to do the work was because I believed you cared, and that's what other people want to know from their people who are leading them. Do they care about me? Do they see me as a person I am? Do they see me with the hurts that I have? Do they see me with the strengths that I have? Do they see me with the challenges that I have, or do they just see me as a tool to be used? Right, I Do they see me with the challenges that I have, or do they just see me as a tool to be used?
Speaker 1:All right, I know we're going to take a break, but I want to read that question again. I want to leave that as a pause in between breaks before we come back and go to the next, the next half. Do we, as leaders, understand how to be humans that declare humanity as an item we should all be keenly aware of?
Speaker 3:I'm going to being a leader. We hope that in every episode you find some bit of information that will help you on your own personal leadership journey. In order to reach more people and to improve our positioning on all the podcasting and social media platforms, it's important that you subscribe to our podcast on your favorite podcasting platform, like Apple, spotify or any other platform where you listen to First Lead you. We would really appreciate you clicking on the subscribe button to help us reach more people and expand the message of First Lead you. And please take time to visit the First Lead you website. That's the number one S-T, the word lead and the letter U dot com. First Lead you dot com. Number one S-T, the word word lead and the letter ucom. I hope you have a great day as you continue to learn to first lead you. Welcome back to First Lead U.
Speaker 3:Today we are on the H in our chart acrostic, which you can download from our website at firstleaducom. Chart across it, which you can download from our website at firstleaducom. That's the number one letters s-t-l-e-a-d and then the letter u. So firstleaducom to get your chart, which is charting in a new and better path to leadership. So we've gone through the c's in some previous episodes and real quickly.
Speaker 3:That's the coach, the commander, the cop, the counselor. These are the lenses or the hat that you may wear when you're in a leadership role. These are the different roles you'll play as you go throughout your day or your week. Now we're to the H's and so that is all kind of focused on human being, human understanding that we're all humans. So the first H is human. Then we got human nature, human resources and human capital. So those are the four H's in the H of the chart acrostic and we've been talking about human today and John's been leading us through some thoughts on that and the idea that we really need to respect everyone, we need to value everyone. We've talked about a couple examples of that, but, john, you've got some additional information you want to share with us as we get into this second half of the podcast.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So, leaders, from a human standpoint, one of the most important things to understand is the social interaction between humans, and there are five different ways that human interaction takes place, and that's exchange, competition, conflict, cooperation and accommodation. So, exchange of information we should be talking conversing. If you go back to COVID, there was a lot of people said you know, uh, you know depression, we weren't interacting with each other. Uh, we, we started getting on zoom calls and we started just interacting that way because we weren't, uh, interacting with each other. But they're out of that, with depression and alcoholism going up and actual the actually the amount of statistics that they showed that domestic assaults and things like. Because we're as humans, we need to have social interaction, and all of a sudden we did, and that was. That was difficult for our, our brains, our bodies, our minds, our souls, and so there needs to be an exchange.
Speaker 1:There is a competition to us as humans. We're we're no different than you know animals that are trying to one up each other, or have you know? So there's a competition. Competition's healthy, but it can lead to unhealthiness, and so, as a leader, you need to understand that you're going to have competition in your organization. Make it a healthy competition. Don't let it get unhealthy. You also need.
Speaker 1:There's conflict in humans. Humans are never. I mean, look at what's going on in the divide in our country right now. There's a social conflict that's taking place in our country right now and leaders aren't really addressing it. I think at some levels I see that they're putting fuel on the fire, if you will, to this divide, and I sit back and I struggle with that, knowing that there's a better way to take this divide and sit down at the table and talk about it the proverbial table but I don't see leaders stepping up and saying hold on, this is enough. We got to stop this. Then there's the cooperation. We should learn how to cooperate with each other. When there is conflict, it's best to cooperate.
Speaker 1:Those that know know I do a lot of mediation between conflicted situations and I deal with some pretty messy stuff, but my ultimate goal with doing that mediation is to have both parties walk away healthier than when they came in. That's what that's what I try to do. And then accommodation. Not all of us are the same and we have to understand that. That's probably one of the most difficult is we get this mindset that I I think this way, I see things this way and so everybody should wrong. That's not true and and it may be something just from a DNA standpoint of personality some of it could be learned.
Speaker 1:You know, one of the one of the speeches I do is I'll bring out a jar of mayonnaise and say you know, why do you eat mayonnaise, this type of mayonnaise? Well, I was, I grew up on that mayonnaise or I grew up on that ketchup or whatever it is, and so generationally you eat that kind of mayonnaise. Your significant other you get, you get married and they ate this kind of mayonnaise and are like how in the world do you eat that? Jfg versus Dukes or Lord forbid, miracle whip salad dressing, douglas, you, you bring that into the equation.
Speaker 1:You're going to see people really kind of get crazy oh yeah, please do not give me a miracle, don't do it, yeah, but and I'm a heinz ketchup guy, you know I like heinz ketchup better than I do hunts or these other ones. So, but I was, I was, I grew up on Heinz ketchup, but that accommodation piece of it is so important. So, as a leader, understanding how the exchange, the competition, the conflict, cooperation, the accommodation works is so important in the human aspect of it Because once you understand that, you understand that it is crucial for your mental health and your team's mental health. Not fighting those five social interactions, not addressing them, not understanding that they're there and how to navigate them throughout your organization, is going to create emotional and mental strife on you and your team and you, you as a leader need to understand how to navigate through those challenges.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I think that's probably one of the key reasons that we need good leaders is to kind of walk through difficult times and the strife that gets created, you know, sometimes unintentionally, amongst teams and just amongst us as as a people group, right, so we have conflict, that. How do you deal with that? Because how you resolve some of those things is going to be key to the success of the outcome. How you resolve some of those things is going to be key to the success of the outcome.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so not only is there a mental health aspect to this, but there's also the cognitive functions that we talk about, because, as a leader, you start seeing these social interactions between the various personality traits inside your organization and you can much more quickly diffuse or deal with the situation because you're now aware of it.
Speaker 3:And that's really important for the leader to cognitively embrace the human aspect of an organization yeah, and we we have talked about this before and a lot of the things we do with our assessments and talk about 16 personalities or Myers-Briggs. It's important to understand those personalities because, if you know, team member A is just going to react one way to something and team member B is going to then be equally responsive because of the way the first one reacted. If you know that, you can start diffusing that situation before it ever really gets, you know, gets taking off, so to speak. But uh, yeah, understanding the different personalities that are working with you and we've talked about not that doesn't, that's not limited to just the personality type, but thinking about what age group are they in? What does you know? How does that generation respond to something versus another generation?
Speaker 3:Helping people understand each other, and we've done exercises where we've gotten teams together and we've kind of literally put them in boxes that we mapped out on the floor of, like this is your personality type, go stand, you know, go stand in this box. And we started off as a big group and we're like, oh, if you're this, if you're an introvert versus extrovert, step on this side of the line. If you're this feeling versus judging, step on this side of the line and so the way they all started as a group and then they start breaking apart, then they actually kind of visualize we are all different, we don't see things the same, and when your best friend is in the opposite corner of you and you're like I would have never guessed right that that was the case, and so it really helps the more someone understands the diversity of the personalities, as well as the uniquenesses of the personality and how you can step into those situations and lead or effectively, because you understand how people are going to react or interact.
Speaker 1:I was uh. So in my research and study I was uh. I say this a lot and leaders cringe when I say this, but there's a there's just the truth of it. There's a psychology to leadership and most people don't like to stop and say, oh, what does that mean? And dive into that. The more that you understand the human aspect of the team, the better you're going to build relationships with your team, which is crucial to the success of yourself as a leader and your team. Your customer, the business society, the family, the building blocks the relationships start with understanding the human aspect of your team.
Speaker 3:Well, and again, let's go back to firstly, jew. I mean, the better you understand your human aspects and what life experiences have molded you, what DNA you know impacts you, the different uh ways that you see things, the more you understand that about yourself, the more you're willing to give kind of that same grace and uh openness to other people as you as you interact with them. So, uh, it starts with understanding yourself and like why am I, why do I react to things? Or you know, I know, I realize if I do this on a regular basis, then I'm actually in a much healthier place mentally, physically, emotionally, than if I, you know, stay up, know, and only get two or three hours of sleep every night, or whatever it is Like. It's like understanding your humanity as well as understanding the humanity of your team.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's so important we we were talking through the first lead you concept of looking at yourself internally to understand those reasons you do the things you do. The reality is your team knows probably more about your buttons and what's coming than you do and they'll know like, oh, when, when this happens, he, she, reacts this way and some of it will use those against you. If you're not aware of it, they're aware of it and they will use those against you. If you're not aware of it, they're aware of it and they will use that against you. So, as a leader, you need to understand yourself in order to understand how to do the things that need to be done to lead the people, because when you do that, the relationships that you create will become a risk.
Speaker 1:There'll be a response inside your organization that that fog that's there starts to clear up and you'll be able to see much more clear as a leader in your organization. Because today most leaders, when we deal with them, are literally seeing things through a very foggy lens in their organization themselves and the people, and they're just confused about why the fog's there. They don't know. We're telling them why the fog's there, but until we get there and start explaining it to them. Just something as simple as you have four generations working in your organization that hear, react and think differently.
Speaker 3:Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 3:And one of the things that we know and understand and have seen time and time again is like and a lot of these people want to be better leaders, but there's not been anyone who's given them any sort of formal training or helped them to understand how to be a leader.
Speaker 3:And you know, we we talked about this all the time as well or leaders born or made Well, even the born leaders need some guidance early on, like they need somebody to help them like take here's what your raw talent is, now let's guide that just a little bit so that you can apply it appropriately. And so we all need that kind of early guidance. And a lot of times, because of all the things we've talked about on other episodes, people just aren't getting the training they need to be good leaders, despite their own desires to be good leaders, and so they get left to their own devices. They have to kind of start figuring it out on their own, and that's why we start we've talked about again. Go back to it Firstly. It's like the more you can start to understand yourself and lead yourself properly, the more it opens your eyes to be able to better lead your team.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's so important human, which takes us into our, our next uh H, which is human nature. This one's really a deep dive because of not just the DNA, of taking things from your parents and you incorporate them, but things in your childhood that have happened, and then things in your adulthood. And now all of a sudden that person's been hired and you know, we don't like that word, we like the word select. But the companies hire people with a job description and expect that person to come in and just do what they wanted to do. And that's another reason people left because they said we're not even being trained. You're just dumping us in a position even though we're immensely qualified for it, the resume and all whatever. But you're dumping us in there because how you want it done or your company could be different from the company that I just came from. And so now you're dumping me in there. No training, it said sink or swim, and that doesn't feel good to today's worker.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah, and it's a disservice to them, it's a disservice to your company, it's a disservice to the other people who are already on the team. It's going to be highly disruptive to bring someone in and it not be a good fit, and you know.
Speaker 1:So it's really responsibility of the person who is in charge of the department human resources to make sure that they are finding the right fit for a position yeah, so, uh, we hope you've enjoyed listening to the first h on our acrostic chart that can be downloaded from the first lead you website um and uh, as always, and we want you to remember, as leaders, in order to lead your team well, you must first lead. We'll see you next time.
